Spiders (2000)

Hello, everyone. Adam here, and welcome to Day 12 of my 31 Days Of Horror! Tonight’s film was a total surprise to me. Not only was this another poorly thought out Poundland purchase, but – you know what? It’s also pretty bloody great!

From the special effects team behind From Dusk Til Dawn, Spawn and Wishmaster comes Spiders! Now. Listen closely here, because there’s a lot of ground we need to cover.

Okay, so, first off, Aliens exist and inhabit Area.. 21. Yeah. We know this because NASA just launched a rocket containing a spider – the world’s deadliest kind, mind you – with a big old syringe of alien DNA. To see what happens, the spider – affectionately known as Mother In Law – is taken into zero gravity to better reflect the alien DNA within it.

Things take a turn for the worst when a sudden, unexpected solar flare, wipes out the astronauts and sends the shuttle plummeting back to Earth – just so happening to crash mere metres from UFO-obsessed journalist Marci Eyre and her team of Lone Gunmen-esque nerds. They wander inside and find a horrific scene – and it doesn’t look like it was the crash that killed them.

Eventually, the Government catch up with the crash site and haul off the evidence to Area 21 – including our group of heroes who just so happened to hide in one of the trucks. What they discover.. is not good. Especially when they find the only survivor of the crash, who IMMEDIATELY vomits up a giant spider – setting the film into motion.

What follows is a fight for survival in the halls of the military base as the spider grows ever larger and more dangerous – before eventually escaping into the wild in an example of absolute camp b movie glory.

Oh, shush. It’s not perfect, but I loved it. The special effects – the practical ones, anyway – are legitimately good.. although the film does sadly suffer from naughties CGI. Oh, brother. 

It’s dumb. It’s silly. It features nerds using bazookas, and, frankly, it’s better than watching something by The Asylum. Get yourself to Poundland and check it out!


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